iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
iPhone user: I just like this pho-
Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*


Are we not going to discuss this

this is literally what makes bob’s burgers funny like the written jokes are so dry and the story lines are pretty stale but it’s subtle things like this that make it a good show

why are those “me/you” posts always so embarrassing?

the maze runner was good


TSA: are u carrying any firearms or explosives?

Me: *points to crotch* u mean this bomb pussy?

TSA: why do u always do this?


The footage of former Ravens running back Ray Rice punching his then-fiancée in the face started a much-needed conversation about domestic violence. This comedian took a completely different approach with a “Ray Rice Inspired Makeup Tutorial” that could’ve gone so incredibly wrong but instead gets it so so right.

syncing my entire itunes library to my phone because i finally have enough room like wow what a weird feeling to not have to delete five pictures and an app every time i want to take one picture

Sorry for being rude I didn't mean it I just felt angry today and lashed at the first thing that annoyed me, hope I didn't offend you

It’s alright, it’s just sad that that was your go-to way to respond to something that was clearly meant to be taken as a joke.

It was your attitude you dingbat

It was clearly a joke you dingbat

Did me getting the new iPhone really anger someone so much they sent me like 7 messages varying from “shut up” to a more extreme and petty “kill yourself”??

Just die

how many messages are you going to send me you embarrassing freak get a hobby other than checking up on my every move and spamming my inbox

the rest of yall are plebs dont follow me if u blog via anything less than a 5s unfollow me if ur reading this from an android except the amazon fire phone thats kinda cool👍

whew goddesses i got the new iphone i’m back in the game

truthteahunty peta’s whole movement is based on animal equality like they want us to treat animals with the same respect as humans so comparing what we’ve done to humans in the past i.e. slavery or the holocaust is to back their message